


K-I-S-S-I-N-G

by vinniebatman



Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Poor Andrew, Spells & Enchantments, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-03
Updated: 2013-04-03
Packaged: 2017-12-07 08:41:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/746548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vinniebatman/pseuds/vinniebatman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At Connor and Dawn's wedding, things get a bit weird.</p>
            </blockquote>





	K-I-S-S-I-N-G

**Author's Note:**

> **Spoilers:** General spoilers for both tv shows. Disregards the comics.  
>  **Prompt:** Spander, tree for [](http://anxiety-junkie.livejournal.com/profile)[**anxiety_junkie**](http://anxiety-junkie.livejournal.com/)  
>  **Beta:** [](http://users.livejournal.com/_beetle_/profile)[](http://users.livejournal.com/_beetle_/)**_beetle_**  
>  **Disclaimer:** I so totally own this show. Bow Down! *Doctor's  
>  Note: Patient exhibits delusions of grandeur and any claims of  
> ownership are pure fantasy. No harm is meant. Seriously, it's better  
> than her throwing rocks at people.*  
>  **Real Disclaimer:** I make no money from this, and claim no  
>  ownership over the to any of the copyrighted material of "Buffy the  
> Vampire Slayer" or "Angel the Series." Those works belong to their  
> creators.

On a sunny Sunday morning, the dining hall was filled with Slayers,  
Watchers, and guests.  Many had gathered at the Montreal Slayers'  
Academy for Dawn and Connor's wedding, and quite a few were still  
feeling the aftereffects of the wedding reception; namely,  
embarrassment.

No one had been too surprised the previous evening when Connor had  
suddenly tossed Dawn over his shoulder and run from the dance floor,  
the puffy white dress billowing behind them.  It also wasn't  
surprising when several established couples had suddenly began kissing  
and groping.  Weird, yes, but surprising, no.

It was more surprising when Faith had suddenly yelled "fuck it,"  
punched out Kennedy, and then'd thrown Willow onto a table and jumped  
on top of her.  A few Slayers and several men were disappointed when  
the writhing, kissing couple had suddenly teleported away.  Those  
unaffected by the strange mood had investigated and found the cause of  
these actions to be Andrew, who'd cast a spell looking for his true  
love.

The next morning, most of the couples sat at breakfast, red faced.  Of  
course, Willow had apologized profusely to Kennedy, while Faith had  
just shrugged smugly.  Two minutes later, Kennedy was once again  
unconscious at Faith's hand, having attempted to kiss Willow.  Because  
it turned out that while the effect of the spell had been an accident,  
the desires involved hadn't been created, just revealed.  Which  
meant....

It was at this moment that a hunched, bashful figure entered the  
doorway: Xander.  His face was a bright shade of red as he entered the  
dining hall, fidgeting with is eye patch before scurrying over to his  
usual table.

Dawn grinned. " _Spike and Xander_ ," she sing-songed.

Xander glared, but she continued.

" _Sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I--_ "

"That's not what they were doing last night, Dawnie," Faith interrupted.

"Ah, good point.  Fine.  _Spike and Xander, sittin' in a tree,  
F-U-C-K-I--_ "

"Dawnie!" Buffy yelped. "Shut up, I do _not_ need these mental images!"

"Really?  Because I sure as hell don't mind," Faith drawled, leering  
at Xander.

"Faith!" Willow admonished, confusion plainly lining her face.

"What?  Just 'cause I'm all crazy over you don't mean I can't  
appreciate the idea of Spike and Xander fuckin,'" she said.  She  
looked over at Willow with an fond leer, then pulled the witch's chair  
closer.  She leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to her lips, a kiss  
that quickly turned heated.

Xander stared, his eye wide before he looked away and dropped his head  
onto the table.  "God, I have officially entered the evil mirror  
universe.  Just kill me now," he groaned.

"Nah," Connor said, snickering.  "I don't wanna piss Spike off."

"Aw, poor Xander," Willow said.  She placed a hand on his shoulder and  
gently squeezed.  "You should eat."

"Yeah," Connor teased, "He'll need to keep his strength up."

"Yeah, right.  I don't think Spike'll make the same mistake twice,"  
Xander said, lifting his head when the table fell silent.  He frowned  
and scrunched his nose, staring at the group. "Crap, what did I do  
wrong now?"

"Xander, last night happened because Andrew cast a spell," Willow started.

"Figures."  Xander snorted.

"But it wasn't like a lust spell or anything, it was a love spell."

Xander's gaze went blank as he thought.  The next instant, his face  
shifted from fear to confusion to incredulity.  "Wait, Andrew made  
Spike fall in love with me?" he squeaked.

"Not quite," Willow said.  "See--"

"What my girl here means to say is that it only makes you act on what  
you want, it doesn't make you want something you normally don't,"  
Faith interrupted.

Xander's eye widened as his jaw dropped.  "So you're saying that  
Spike... like, normally wants me?"

"Yep."

A small smile quirked his lips, then grew into a full smile.  A bark  
of laughter errupted from him, short and surprised, but joyous.  "Wow,  
so we're like, the weirdest pairing, huh?"

"Not even close, Boy Toy," Faith drawled.

Xander nodded before falling silent.  He sat still for a few moments,  
frowning.  Then in a rush, he suddenly stood, his chair clattering to  
the floor.  He quickly fashioned a sandwich out of bacon and pancakes  
before running out of the room.

Five minutes later, Andrew stumbled into the room.  His face was pale  
and drawn as he walked gingerly, his movements careful as he  
approached the original Scoobies.

"Wow, Andrew. You look like you were rode hard and put away wet," Buffy noted.

Andrew frowned. "What does that even mean?" he asked.

"I dunno," Buffy said with shrug.  "I guess it--"

"You little worm!"

The room fell silent as Kennedy struggled to her feet.  Her face was  
bruised and bloody as she stood, her eyes filled with a hate directed  
right at Andrew.  She lunged at him, but before she could make  
contact, Illyria was there, holding her off the ground, a blue hand  
wrapped around Kennedy's throat.

"Let it be known henceforth that none may punish my consort but me,"  
Illyria announced.

The room was once again silent, broken only by one sound:

Andrew's whimper.


End file.
